Monday, January 27, 2014

Reasons Not To Yawn at Last Night's Grammys

I think we can all agree that last night's 56th Annual Grammy Awards were a major yawn fest. The ratio of country stars to "other" was far too high for my taste and the pace was slower than a turtle on Marijuana. However, we must remember the reason we all watch these Awards shows to begin with. No, it is not the talent (okay, maybe partially). It is NOT because we love watching the host make corny jokes about all the nominated stars (Sorry, LL Cool J). It's because we love replaying those fashion moments in our minds and translating them into best-dressed lists. It is our obsession as human beings with nothing better to do than rate our favourite celebrities and tweet all about it.

In case y'all are getting a little bored of the best dressed list, here is a "best fashion moments list" (a.k.a the reason it was worth staying up for the Grammys):

NUMBER 10: Giuliana Rancic's Alex Perry Orange

Giuliana Rancic HAD to have a place on this list merely because she's always well dressed. She may not be a country star, or a pop star, or any kind of musician, BUT she is our favourite fashionista. This E! host was like a bottle of orange crush and we're totally crushing on her look (corny pun intended).

NUMBER 9: The Robo Helmut

Headwear was surprisingly popular last night at the Grammys. You all know I'm a sucker for a great hat and the Daft Punk robo helmut appearance was no exception. These boys make me want to be one of the guys and a Star Wars geek all at once (and that's saying a lot).

Let's get one thing clear. Yoko Ono herself is a fashion statement. Yoko Ono with those glasses was "I'm so drugged tonight" chic and well, who can blame her? We all could've used some drugs to get excited about the Grammys last night.

NUMBER 7: Anna Kendrick's Boobs

Last night, Anna Kendrick made a statement, with her boobs. It took a moment to take in the beauty of this Azzaro dress merely because we were all very distracted by the awkward boob situation. I kind of secretly love it though.

NUMBER 6: Madonna's Suit and Child 

Madonna arrived at the Grammys in a suit and child. No, this is not a Justin Timberlake song. This is real life. Her adopted son, David, arrived as her chic accessory in a matching Ralph Lauren tuxedo.

NUMBER 5: Queen Bey's Net Thong

Everyone was marvelling at the gorgeous momma bod on Beyonce and the thong that got caressed by hubby Jay Z. By far the hottest couple of the night, these two took the stage by storm, blowing us all away in the opening performance of Drunk in Love.

NUMBER 4: Katy's Valentino

Fresh off the runway, Katy Perry snags the Valentino Haute Couture opening look with Grammy appropriate musical notes at the skirt. That woman knew what she was doing.

NUMBER 3: TayTay's Chain Dress

I completely and utterly adored this Gucci dress as predictable as it was. We all know Taylor Swift loves herself some sparkling bling, but this was just mind-blowing. 

NUMBER 2: Queen Bey Does It Again

Beyonce is so darn gorgeous, she merited two spots on this list. The only reason she isn't my number one is because there was one fashion moment that was more talked about than her dress as you'll soon discover. But, all jokes aside, this was simply WOW. Breathtaking.

And The Number 1 is...

Pharrell's Hats

That's right. If you hadn't yet guessed it based on my hashtag subtlenotsosubtle clues, Pharrell KILLED it with his two cowboy hats. Not only was a Twitter account created in the name of the hat @Pharrellshat, reaching hundreds of followers in a number of minutes, but it was the best darn metaphor for America's country obsession that I've ever seen. Props to Pharrell for the being the fashion king at the Grammys.

(And I'd also like to give an honourable mention to Cyndi Lauper's hair. It was outrageously red and needs mentioning.

That's all for now, folks. Hope you enjoyed this list more than the tedious Grammys. All things considered, there were some epic moments. Here's some advice for those hoping to catch it on YouTube. If you watch the last hour and the first hour, that's where it all happens. 

See You At The Oscars!


10 Days Until NYFW

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