Wednesday, March 5, 2014


Before we get into the nitty gritty of Paris Fashion Week, let's dwell upon the most frightening Spring 2014 trend. It resurfaces every year. We love to marvel at the ladies who sport it, but secretly fear making the attempt ourselves. It's timelessly classy and universally flattering (more or less).

Head to toe WHITE.

Reasons I'm afraid of this trend:
1) I'm clumsy
2) Fear of dirt stains immediately after purchase
3) Fear of lipstick
4) Fear of food stains
6) Fear the stains cannot be removed
7) Fear of sitting somewhere repulsive
8) Fear of visible ailments

Essentially, it will get dirty (in case you couldn't read between the lines). White is the most terrifying non-colour of the rainbow. It may appear impeccable in photos, but in your mirror, you notice the tiny dirt stain on your knee that materialized after you accidentally kneeled on your wooden floors. Upon trying on that white blouse, you realized too late that you wore red lipstick that day (better go fetch a new one and let someone else buy my lipstick stained blouse!). SOMEONE wore self-tanner and you didn't notice it until it stared you in the face in your bedroom lighting. Oh, and then it started to rain (OOPS!).

Wearing white is terrifying because of that fear of the almighty conspicuous stain. It's almost as though you're constantly jinxing it in your mind as soon as it lands inside your closet. You know you examined it in the store until you lost your vision, but as soon as you got home, you stumbled upon a dark spot you hadn't quite noticed. WHY OH WHY. I LOVE head-to-toe white, but the reality is that i'm paranoid and incapable of not getting dirty. Every time I eat, I have to remove my shirt and switch to something I secretly hate and hope it gets a splotch of tomato sauce on it.

So the question is: WHEN CAN YOU WEAR WHITE?

1) For a photo (Instawhite!)
2) Your wedding (hopefully).
3) Indoors (but remember not to sit down or kneel or touch ANYTHING)
4) School (but AVOID PENS at all costs)
5) A photoshoot (because we all do those on a regular basis)

OR if you want to live on the edge, go for it. After all, YOLO.


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