Tuesday, December 9, 2014

The December Shopping Disease

via nebraskahub.com
Yes, I have resurfaced from exam period (more or less) unscathed with much adrenaline to spare. With sales like Black Friday and Cyber Monday screaming my name, it was a wonder I stayed away from the shopping world and remained deeply immersed in my books. I must admit, Cyber Monday threw me slightly off guard (when did that become a thing?). But, alas, I managed to resist the urge to press that "add to cart" button and avoid Facebook ads like the plague (yes, they do occasionally entice me).

But today, all that has changed, my friend. Today, I have been freed of the heavy weight of literature and I have caught the bug. No, I am not sick in the coughing fit kind of way. I merely have the December shopping disease. Is it the Christmas jingles playing in every story putting me in the mood? Is it the snow falling from the sky inducing me to buy more sweaters? Is it a desire to decompress after remaining cooped up in the library? I could not say. But this disease has taken over my body and my immune system is struggling to fight it.

After all, it is only natural that with Boxing Week (best holiday of the year) rapidly approaching, my desire to shop is continuously expanding like a hot air balloon and eventually, it will explode. The stores will beckon and I will enter. That rush will return as I touch every soft fabric in sight against my dried up winter withered hands.

It might not be Boxing Day for a few weeks, but the sales have begun and everything that you will probably still be wearing for the next six months (due to the lengthiness of winter) is now at a reduced price. The promotions are yelling "BUY ME!". The red stickers are officially your favourite kind of stickers and invite you to blow kisses at them (if you're crazy enough). And sales people are starting to look slightly more attractive due to your blurred lovestruck vision.

December is officially being renamed "Shoptember". It sounds a little like September, which has already been taken, but we'll let it slide. This is the month when you can permit yourself to go a little nuts. Shoptember is about making yourself feel better on a -30 degree day. It's about making the best of winter by staying indoors, while avoiding hibernation. The mall is your new best friend. Open your arms to it.

So, take your best friend to lunch. And dinner. And breakfast. It is after all a season to be jolly and nothing makes me more jolly than a good sale.

Happy Shoptember!



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